Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Comments?

I've been posting on this blog for nearly 5 years. I had hoped that when I started it, that people would comment and provide feedback. I had hoped that, by putting out my opinions, that those who disagreed would come and help me check my thinking. And in doing so, I could learn something that I didn't previously know. Maybe I'd change my mind.

But I get so few comments. And I don't know why. It's certainly not because my thinking is above reproach. Those of you who have managed to garner a lot of comments, how do you do it?

On a side note: blogs that don't allow comments make no sense to me. I find almost no value in having a one-sided conversation. It seems about as useful as talking to a wall.

15 comments:

Niffer said...

I don't know how people do it. I know of a few blogs that get hundreds of comments. I've recently started getting a few comments every week, but I don't know what to contribute the change to. It used to bother me so much to know people read my blog but never commented. It still does. I know lots of my family and friends read my blog and if it weren't for Stats Counter, I would never know. It bothers me that they never speak up, especially when I specifically request their opinion on something. It just seems like spying. I realize it's not, but it just feels awkward for them to read my opinions and remain completely silent with no acknowledgment that they were even there.

Like you, I certainly don't understand blogs that don't allow comments. I find it annoying and somewhat self-righteous. I'm sure you're speaking of one of my friend's blogs, and I don't understand why he made that change. It just seems odd to me. Comments bring a blog to life.

As for why your blog doesn't get many comments, I don't really have a solution (like I said, I don't know how to get my numbers up either, and it's only been recently that I get comments on a relatively consistent basis), but I can tell you why *I* don't comment on your blog very often.

I only comment on your blog when you write something I can relate to or that brings a smile to my face. You write a lot about budget stuff and statistics, which I find for interesting reads but 1. They don't make me laugh or smile, 2. They don't make me cry and 3. I don't have a strong opinion on them one way or another so I don't know what to say if I did comment. That being said, I still find them interesting to read.

Does that make sense? I'd guess it's different for everyone, but that's how I work. Something has to either touch my heart on a personal level or be something I have an opinion on one way or another in order for me to feel compelled to respond. But there are still a lot of things I like reading that don't leave me feeling like I want to respond.

Niffer said...

I recently started a parenting yahoo group for my friends and friends of friends. My hope is to have people from across the country be in the group to give ideas and solutions on common parenting issues. I know there's a lot of good ideas out there that no single parent can come up with on their own. I'd love it if you'd join! Let me know if you're interested.

Niffer said...

Plus I'd like to point out that you haven't been writing much and it's hard to comment on stuff that hasn't been written. =)

Niffer said...

Last night I was thinking about this and still didn't come to any brilliant conclusions. I know I cherish the comments I get and want to let those people know, so I try to at least acknowledge every comment I get. I don't know if people check back to see my responses, but I'd like to think it shows them that I appreciated them responding. Just a thought.

mjh said...

There's a bit of irony here in that I didn't respond to your previous comments. I do, btw, really appreciate them.

You could be right about the importance of responding to every comment. I may have to try that.

And it is true that I haven't been writing a lot lately. And one of the previous speculations of yours was that it was because I was spending more time on facebook. I think that's true. I get a lot more feedback from my friends.

Re: the content of my blog, I would think that the topics are of the type that many people have highly varied opinions, which I would think would generate more comments. But, obviously, only for those who have opinions on those topics.

And yes, "Something Man" was part of what I was thinking about when I think of commentless blogs. Of course, there are many others also.

Thanks for your comments.

Niffer said...

I certainly agree with you that the topics you write about are those that many people probably have highly varied opinions on, so I'm surprised you don't get more comments. I only mentioned the topics because for **ME** I don't feel strongly about them.

I got sucked into Facebook for a while too, and am now over 100 friends! Look at me! I'm popular! However, for me, it's gotten a little too much to keep me interested. I'm bombarded with information and updates from people who are my "friends" but I don't really care about seeing their updates. Do you know how to filter who you see on the "home" page?

Good luck getting more comments! I'd hate to see you stop writing.

mjh said...

I will have to write a blog on how to do this. Basically it involves creating groups for your friends. Then when you go to your home page you can easily click on the group that you want to see.

There are other ways too. For example you can make it so that you never see updates from certain friends. I find it easier to just put all of my friends into groups and then filter the groups.

But the future blog will explain both. My wife & kids are going out of town this afternoon. So I'll have time to write it up.

mjh said...

Oh, I forgot.. I am interested in joining the Yahoo group. Can you give me the name of the group and I'll go try and join? I'm not interested in sharing my email address in comments, and comments are the only way that I know how to communicate w/you.

Niffer said...

http://
groups.yahoo.com/
group/
Secrets_of_Parenting/

(sorry for splitting it up)
I'm glad you're interested! I was hoping you would be!

Jimazing said...

Just to let you know that you have more than one reader... a comment ;-)

Niffer said...

Ugh! Another one of my friends just announced her comment-free-zone blog. I just don't get it, and in this particular case, I find that I'd love to comment on a lot of her posts.

She's Something Man's wife, so I guess I shouldn't be terribly surprised by the ban on comments, but I just don't get it.

Comments bring my blog to life. Without them, why bother to publish a blog?

Thanks for letting me vent. I couldn't think of where else to do it.

mjh said...

I don't understand the not allowing comments thing, either. But maybe there's a reason. If you know Something Man's wife personally, maybe you could ask her?

You are welcome to vent here anytime you like.

Michael said...

Hi, I have a blog that is comment free. Want to know why? Because I don't really need a comment. My blog is there for anyone who wants to read it, but I don't need comments or questions. This blog is a holding place for quotes, images/videos, immediate thoughts or something I can take note of and go back and review months/years ahead.

You see there are many different types of blogs. I would even say that some are not really blogs, but make good use of blogging software. Some are good for conversations, while some are good for just information. Hope that helps. :)

vakadesign said...

I really, really enjoy getting comments on my blog, and usually get a few a day. I wish I got more! I started the blog to compliment my business, and hadn't anticipated that getting comments and interacting with readers would be so rewarding. I'm disappointed if I don't get comments, now!

When I stop to think about why I get comments (as I have because of this post), I think it is because much of what I write is so personal, and the personal is often very universal; they can relate to my experiences. And that's almost always what I write about: my experiences at home, with my kids, in dating, in my studio... I just sort of report on my life, and my readers begin to converse with me, they join me in the experience. My comments are often just friendly notes to let me know a post really made someone laugh, or touched them. I love that!



But! I just wrote a big long comment on your abortion post...it was brilliant, and solved the whole issue =) It got eaten! OY!! Now the world will never know.....

mjh said...

Vakadesign,

Thanks for the comment. I think you're right that the more personal you make it the more interesting people will find it and the more they'll have to say. Both you and Niffer do a great job of this.

And of course, I know this, too. I even wrote a blog entry on this topic:

http://dullgeek.blogspot.com/2008/10/how-i-blog.html

And for a little bit, I was able to write a few things that were much more about me than about how I think. Unfortunately, I can't do that all the time. A *huge* part of who I am is how I think about things, and I can't help but need to get that information written somewhere.

And it's not like I chose tame subjects. I choose subjects that, I would think, would generate a lot of opinions.

So far, the best generator of hits & comments is to go onto someone else's blog, and post a comment and in it link back to my own blog saying something like, "Hey, I blogged about this here..."

BTW, LOL re: the solution to the abortion issue. You crack me up! "Drive-by de-nutting" is one of my all-time favorite phrases.

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